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Showing posts from April, 2013

The Misunderstood Platypus

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I'm taking a poetry class right now, and today, in class, someone brought in a poem they had written in which a platypus was mentioned. We spoke for a long time about the symbolic nature of the platypus in class and it became clear to me that the platypus was a tragically misunderstood creature. I mean most of the class seemed to be laboring under the delusion that it was some sort of beaver-duck from the black lagoon. Someone even suggested that platypi (contrary to what you may have been told, that IS the plural) were marsupials  as if any platypus could be anything as vulgar as a kangaroo! But I digress, my point is that the platypus is majestic creature which should be treated with the utmost respect. I mean, when was the last time you laid an egg? The platypus is one of the only mammals that could make an omelet out of its own offspring; that is both disturbing and delicious. Plus, like all mammals, the platypus can produce its own milk. So basically, the platypus speci

Serious Thoughts: Harry Potter as a Reflection of the Millenial Generation

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Before you say anything, I know I blog about Harry Potter a lot, you're all just going to have to get over it. So, as I do with a lot of things, I came a little late to the Harry Potter fandom. I'm not saying I just started reading the book yesterday or anything (actually, I've been reading them since I was like five) but, because I was quite young when all the books were coming out and the fandom was really taking shape, I'm really only truly experiencing it now. I mean, it's not like I didn't play potions as a kid or have the fake HP glasses or the Harry Potter Levitating Challenge game ('Focus' 'Keep Steady!' 'Concentrate!!!!!', but seriously, that was a tough game). Anyway, the sort of things I'm thinking about now are like fan art, Wizard rock, and fan fiction. Anyway, what brought this blog on was that I read this article ( http://thoughtcatalog.com/2013/were-not-a-lost-generation-just-an-exposed-one/ ) and started to

Dye Your Roommate's Hair They Said, Nothing can go Wrong They Said: Tales from the Laundry Room

So, last night, my roommate and I were in CVS and she saw the hair dye section and, out of nowhere, she was like "do you think I should dye my hair black?", to which I responded, "that would look so fetch ". The scary thing is that she said yes. So, what did I do last night? Did I study for my Iberian Civilizations exam? Did I work on my poetry project? Did I do my English reading? Did I get a hop on my math homework? No. I spent like five hours dying my roommate's hair. Isn't it only supposed to take like forty minutes? You ask. Well, reader, I'm glad you asked, because this was not a 'normal' hair dying experience. Let me tell you a little story. So, first things first, when we got back to our dorm, we texted our friend who actually knows something about dying hair. When she came down, the two of us opened the box and put on the gloves and read the instructions and mixed the dye, realized we had no idea what we were doing, and took one

Do You Think Voldemort Goes to the Grocery Store?

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Murderers! So, this is the sort of question that keeps me up at night. Recently, I've been thinking a lot about the logistics of the Harry Potter books (probably because I have math and my mind, you know, tends to not like to think about math and stuff) and I've come up with quite the karfuffle. Where do wizards get their food? Now, this is only one of the many alarming, wizard social trends that I discussed in my earlier blog about the Hogwarts style of education, but still, I think we should take a moment to think about this. Are there wizard farmers? Are their wizard super markets in Diagon Alley with flying vegetables and talking eggs and cheese that smiles at you? Because, if so, it is never mentioned in any of the books! Which is disheartening, because I would like my cheese to smile at me. Since the wizarding world seems to have nearly full employment (props to them on their economic planning), I guess there is enough labor to support this sort of system and, any

Serious Thoughts: Jaime Lannister as the Ill-Made Knight

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So, I know I said that I wasn't going to write any more Game of Thrones blogs for a while, but this is a serious thoughts blog, so it's different. Anyway, I'm taking a comparative literature class right now and we've been talking about the knightly ideals of Nordic cultures in literature and their change over time, which I think is quite interesting. But, anyway, it's got me thinking about the representation of knighthood in A Song of Ice and Fire , which seems to share the sort of knightly ideal exhibited in early, Christian Europe, but it doesn't really seem to live up to that ideal (not to say that Europeans actually lived up to that ideal, although Britain did choose to make Paul McCartney a knight, so they're improving). Obviously, as, within the first five chapters of the first book, Jaime Lannister has already pushed a small boy out of a window because he saw him committing incest with his sister.  Hm. Well, as I said, this really doesn

My Idiosyncrasies

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So, I'm a fairly idiosyncratic person (as my roommate will certainly tell you). Don't ask me why, maybe I'm just channeling Sheldon Cooper or something (not a bad thing). I mean, what is life without some mild psychosis? Anyway, the reason I'm writing this blog is because my roommate and I challenged each 550 × 546 - comicbook.c other to make a list of our, many idiosyncrasies (ie things that we can't stand). This is her blog , and this is mine. Don't judge. 1. People who chew gum too loudly bother me. 2. I hate it when the blankets are longer on one side of the bed than the other. 3. I can't stand people who wear two different socks (unless its in an ironic, hipster way; that's okay). 4. The combination of the colors orange and pink in the same outfit makes me cringe. 5. When people say Wingardium LevioSA instead of LeviOsa I cry . Compulsive Hand Raising Disease 6. People who dog ear pages in books make me angry. 7. I have hear

The Wizard Education System Does Not Prepare you for Real Life

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So, lately I've been reflecting on the wizarding world of Harry Potter and I've got to say, I don't think Hogwarts prepares you for real life (by real life, I of course mean wizard life). Don't get me wrong here, I love the Harry Potter books and I would totally go to Hogwarts if I could, but upon further reflection, it doesn't seem to be the great, educational institution that it's made out to be. I mean, this isn't just Hogwarts' fault, really, the trouble is with the wizard system of education and, in general, the lack of common sense logistics that seems to trouble wizard society (perhaps, facilitated by a lack of education). And Hank Green expresses this as well. Like, consider it, the average wizard goes to Hogwarts for 7 years (unless you drop out like Harry), and that seems like a lot until you consider that the average kid in America goes to school for twelve years (not counting kindergarten and college, which make it seventeen years). So, by

I Have a Suspicion That Dorian Gray is a Vampire

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So, right now in my English class we're reading The Picture of Dorian Gray by Oscar Wilde and let me tell you something, I think Dorian Gray is a vampire. I mean, if there can be a Pride and Prejudice and Zombies, certainly there can be a Picture of Dorian Gray and Vampires, right? Anyway, there's tons of proof. Like, we know that Dorian Gray does all these horrible, scandalous things towards the middle of the book, but we're never told what they are. For all we know, he's out biting people! That's why everyone is so suspicious and wary of him. Maybe that's what really happened to Sibyl Vane O_o. Also, there's blood on the portrait, which is supposed to be a visual representation of his conscience, so, I don't know, put two and two together. Plus, I don't think we ever actually see Dorian eat normal food. And of course, most obviously, he doesn't age . Like seriously! If that doesn't spell vampire, I don't know what does; besides, he

My History Teacher once Mistook me for Theodore Roosevelt

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We both where glasses, so, we're like twins Just kidding, that didn't actually happen. Because I didn't blog yesterday, so I had to make up for it. What really happened was, when I was in high school, on the first day of my senior history class my teacher (who had taught me before) was taking role and when he got to me, he was like "Maria, are you Dutch by any chance?" (probably in a more teacher-ly way). Anyway, I said yes because my dad's family is, many generations back, originally from the Netherlands and we're sort of like honorary Zeelanders or something (although, they did eventually move to Belgium). Anyway, my history teacher was like "oh, well, I figured because you have a double O in your last name and that's generally indicative of Dutch-ness," (I'm really ad-libbing here) "you know, like Roosevelt". Which, of course, I took to mean that I was Roosevelt like, which was very exciting for me because FDR is my f

Join the Realm - We Have Sigils

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This is my last Game of Thrones blog for a while, I promise. So, I recently discovered that HBO's Game of Thrones website has a Join the Realm feature which lets you make your own Westeros style sigil. Enough said. Two hours later and an abandoned essay later, these are the best sigils I came up with. So, House Oreo . One thing that's been missing from all the blood and guts in Game of Thrones is desert. I mean they're always drinking and feasting and stuff but I'll be darned if I've seen so much as a pudding cup. I mean, how does anyone live their life without the sugary, lard filled confection of wondrous beauty that is the Nabisco Oreo? No wonder everyone in Westeros is so angry all the time. Then we have the house of cool aardvarks. I have tremendous respect for aardvarks (the cute little ears, the beautiful, darling little nose and, also, how many animals do you know that have a double letter at the beginning of their name?), but Join the Realm didn'