Elephants are the Antithesis of the Octopus

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So, I was reading this article about an elephant preserve in Florida (if someone wants to explain why that makes sense) and they were talking about the many virtues of the elephant species. Let me tell you something, I love elephants. Like, I don't think they're too many people in the world who dislike elephants, but I love elephants. I even have an elephant piggy bank! What an oxymoron.

Anyway, the article was talking about the family values of the elephant culture and the way the matriarch elephants hold the herd together and I was so pleased that people are finally starting to realize how great elephants are! To quote the article: "They are family oriented. They're honest and straightforward. We should learn from them". It was about this point in the article that I realized something very important: elephants are the antithesis of octopi.

If you read my blog regularly, you know that octopi really freak me out. It's partially the fact that they have no bones, it's partially that some octopi can predict the outcome of soccer games, and mostly because I once saw a program on the discovery channel that said land octopi were going to take over the world. Like, if some non-human animal had to run the world, I'd rather it be dolphins. Failing that, I would want it to be elephants.

I feel that elephants would do an excellent job of ruling the planet. They have large ears, so they would be able to hear everyone and listen carefully to suggestions. Also, they would probably make peanuts the global food it deserves to be. Most importantly, they could easily squish all the octopi with their giant feet.

Dumbo for president!

Just sayin'

Comments

  1. KiraOctober 30, 2013 at 7:53 PM

    "octopi can predict the outcome of soccer games"--I LOL'ed

    ReplyDelete

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