Game of Thrones Hair

The Buffalo-Star Wars Look

So, as you know, I'm a big Game of Thrones fan but, I have to say, one thing I don't understand about the show is the hair. I mean, I understand that it's a fantasy TV show; I understand that the producers are trying to create a certain Game of Thrones 'style', but some of the hairstyles on the show are ridiculous!

Look at this picture of Cersei (right). No one in the world has that much hair! I know that the actress wears a wig because I've seen her natural hair color in interviews, but still, that must be at least three pounds of hair! That's not natural. I don't even know what to say about this picture, it's just so, so, so much hair. Also, I'm not sure whose idea it was to give her the Princess Leia look. She looks a little like one of those African buffalo with the curved horns. Then, she's got the strands hanging down on the sides, why? Clearly someone went through a lot of trouble to coil her hair up on the sides of her head. Did they get bored half way through? Or did Cersei have her hairstylist beheaded because she couldn't braid quickly enough? (Knowing something about Cersei, I have to guess the second one).

Season 1

But that picture is from the first season, since then Cersei's hairstyles have improved, so I'm willing to forgive the hair and makeup people. However, I am not willing to forgive what they have done to Sansa. Look at this picture. Where does she get her hair done? The Cindy-Lou-Who-Down-in-Whoville Saloon? I mean, it almost looks like she has pigtails, which would be fine, except for the weird bump of hair in the middle of her head. I also have something to say about the dress, but that could be a whole blog within itself. Now, again, this picture is from season one. But even in season two, she's got the triceratops look going on. At least she has a normal amount of hair. Then there's the whole half pigtails thing. It's like some sort of medieval mullet. I mean, if you want to look like you have a ridge of bone growing out of your head, that's your business, but pick one hair style and stick with it. I don't know what the concept was here.

Season 2

The weirdest thing was that no one else has this hairstyle. I mean, if it's supposedly a popular style, why does no one else have it? I mean, Arya has pigtails, Dany wears her hair down, Catelyn has a nice, half pony tail look, and the Dothraki women normally wear their hair up in buns. Even Cersei has a normal hairstyle after the first episode. She looks fine in season three! She just wears her hair down like a normal person (maybe that's why Littlefinger starts to like her so much).

But I don't want to seem like I don't like any of the female hairstyles in Game of Thrones, because I am like totally and completely in love with Dany's hair. I know it's a wig, but if I was Emilia Clarke, I would never take it off.  I mean, her hair has the perfect amount of wavy-ness, and she does lots of cool braid things, and the whole white-hair thing is so striking and beautiful.

My only problem is that the color of her hair doesn't match the color of her eyebrows. This is a problem I have with a lot of people who dye their hair, Cersei has the same issue. I mean, I know that if they bleached her eyebrows, it would look really weird when she didn't have the wig on, but, come on, it'll grow out! Of course, the other concern would be that, if her eyebrows were white, you wouldn't really be able to see them. I don't know if you've ever seen a person without eyebrows, but they always look like they're in a constant state of shock. So, maybe it was a good call not to bleach them completely, but they could have at least lightened her eyebrows a little bit!

However, all things considered, Dany is an outlier in the female hairstyles of Game of Thrones. Look at Arya, after the first season she gets this awful boy haircut. Seriously, it looks like someone hacked off her hair with a rusty butter knife. Now, I know that it's part of the plot, but it just kills me. Brienne of Tarth has the same problem. It looks like someone dropped a mop on her head. In real life, she pulls off the short hair look really well, but it doesn't translate to the show.

No, the guys in Game of Thrones definitely have the better looks (except for Sean Bean, but let's not go there). I mean, Jaime looks like frickin' Prince Charming. He's got the whole, Mufasa, lion mane thing going on (which, I guess, is appropriate for a Lannister). I didn't know it was possible for someone's hair to stand up like that in real life. It's as if someone attached a miniature set of the McDonald's, golden arches to his head. I thought that was just something that happened to Flynn Ryder in Tangled, because, you know, that movie had the whole, magic hair thing going on.

Seriously, how does it stay up like that? I mean, the producers must have had to budget for like five million gallons of hairspray per episode because normal hair does not stay up like that. There must be a whole team of hair specialists working with him at all times. I bet if you watched the end credits really closely, there would be at least three people listed under 'Jaime Lannister's Hair' because no one has hair like that in real life. I think Nikolaj Coster-Waldau should win an award for his hair. No, no there should be an award named after Nikolaj Coster-Waldau's hair. Do you know who else would be nominated for that award? Not Edward Cullen; it looks like someone should be surfing in his hair.


No, seriously, after Jaime, Jon Snow is next in line for king of the hair. There have been whole interviews with Kit Harington centering entirely around his hair. The sad thing is that Kit Harington doesn't even appreciate his hair. He's said in interviews that when he's done with the show, he'll cut his hair. That kills me. He doesn't even condition. What kind of person exhibits that much hair cruelty? There are a million girls who would kill for that hair; I mean, those ringlets, adorable. He should do shampoo commercials. There's a whole Tumblr page dedicated to his hair. People have made videos about his hair, people have written articles, and I'm sure that somewhere, some place, there a group of crazy fan girls who hang out in Iceland trying to chop off a lock of his hair.

Coming soon to a television near you, Game of Hair.

Just sayin'