Just Sayin'

Okay, so I feel like something needs to be said about this topic. Yesterday, I happened to be at my local movie theatre, and the line of people trying to buy tickets to the live action version of the Lion King was around the block. Now, I like the Lion King as much as the next millennial, but I have a problem with this because there is literally no reason to make a "live action" Lion King. I mean, come on, I can't be the only person who thinks this. Like, what is the point of doing a live action version if they're not going to use real lions? (Not that I want them to use real lions; can you imagine how disastrous that would be?) All I'm saying is, if they're going to CGI the lions, why not stick with the original version of the movie? CGI is a form of animation. So, they're really just re-animating and animated movie. Again, I ask you, what's the point of that? (I mean, aside from money, of course. We all know that the real reason they're rem...

A few months ago, I wrote a blog ranking Disney princesses best to worst (actually worst to best, but who pays attention to details like that), so, in the grand tradition of criticizing/ranking/generalized Disney love, I've decided to embark on a road where few dare to tread: ranking Disney princess outfits, and yes, that means ball gowns . Lots and lots of ball gowns. So here we go, Disney outfits from best to worst (actually, it's going to be worst to best, but we already talked about that). Ariel's Seashell Bikini Let's be clear here, Ariel doesn't actually wear clothes. She wears a sea shell bikini. Last time I checked, sea shells were not a valid form of clothing, they're organic calcium by products produced by snails and oysters that need tiny little houses. That's not clothes; we're not in a Lady Gaga music video here. Ariel does redeem herself later in the movie, but we'll get to that later. Ariel's Canvas Toga This is no...

So, as a follow up to my Disney Princesses Best to Worst blog, I decided to write a blog about the best Disney songs, because I think that a lot of great Disney songs are over looked. I mean, I like Let it Go as much as the next person, but it sort of annoys me when people are like "oh, Let it Go is the best Disney song ever...it's so great and original and it has such a great message..." because Disney has produced hundreds of songs in its history and there are quite a few of them that are better than Let it Go. So, without furthur ado, here is my list of best Disney songs (sans Let it Go): Hawaiian Roller Coaster Ride (Lilo and Stitch) God Help the Outcasts (The Hunchback of Notre Dame) Son of Man (Tarzan) Hellfire (The Hunchback of Notre Dame) The Virginia Company (Pocahontas) I Won't Say I'm in Love (Hercules) I Can Go the Distance (Hercules) Whistle Stop (Robin Hood) Cruella DeVille (101 Dalmatians) Just Around the River Bend (Pocahontas) Once U...

So, I recently heard that Disney is making a live action version version of Cinderella , and I can honestly say that I've never been more excited for anything in my entire life (except for maybe The Winds of Winter , but that's a separate blog). Anyway, I'm pretty sure that Disney is making this movie just for me because they know how that I've seen Ever After at least 25 times and if there was a Disney version of that movie, it would shoot right past Titanic to the top of my guilty pleasure movies list. I'm such a girl.  Now, I'm not just excited about this movie because I like Cinderella , although I do like Cinderella. I'm mostly excited because every actor ever, from every TV show I've ever liked   is going to be in this movie. Let me paint a picture for you. Richard Madden is going to play Prince Charming. Can I just take a minute to say "!!!!!". I mean, after he and his entire family were brutally murdered on Game of Thrones ,...

So, I recently saw a YouTube video that ranked all the Disney Princesses from best to worst, and I got really irritated with it because I thought the YouTuber got a lot of things wrong (although, to be fair, it really is a matter of opinion). So I decided to do my own Disney princess ranking from worst to best, you know, because that's how grown ups spend their time. (I know I said best to worst in the title, but it just sounds weird to say worst to best, so sorry for being one of those tricky people who writes misleading blog titles :P). Someone Needs an Attitude Adjustment Tinkerbell - I know that Tinkerbell isn't technically a Disney princess these days, but she was considered one of the original Disney princesses, so I'm going to include her here. I'm going to be honest here, I lover her, but Tinkerbell is an AWFUL person. I mean, she's jealous and spiteful and vain and she get's angry so easily. Not to mention that she totally threw Wendy under the...

So, I am of the opinion that seeing the movie Frozen was possibly the best decision I've ever made in my entire life. I loved it! It's easily the best of the new generation of Disney movies (although Tangled will always occupy a special place in my heart). Anyway, a few days ago, I was procrastinating studying for an exam and I started looking up different songs from Frozen in different languages (I've come to the conclusion that everything sounds better in Norwegian) and I came across a version of Love is an Open Door in Spanish ( La Puerta es el Amor ( The Door is Love - not so good in Spanish)) and there was a comment on the video that made me think. Someone had written that Disney intended this to be Prince Hans' "Villain Song", since later on in the movie you would realize how sinister it really was. This is troubling to me, because I don't think Prince Hans was the villain of Frozen . Sure, he was a villain in Frozen , but he's not the v...

No One in the World Has Hair this Color So, this is a topic that's been bothering me for a while. A few weeks ago, I saw the movie Tangled and, and I know this is the point of the movie, Rapunzel's hair is completely ridiculous. But it got me thinking; Disney movie characters have the most unrealistic hair I've ever seen. Like, seriously! Originally, I was going to include this in a longer blog about things I don't understand about Disney movies, but then I realized there wasn't that much I didn't understand about Disney movies and I had a lot to say about hair. Like, think about The Little Mermaid , I know she's supposed to have red hair, but she doesn't have red hair, she has red hair. In reality, humans who have red hair have orange hair, but Ariel has RED hair, fire engine red. What's more, I don't know if the people at Disney have ever seen hair underwater, but it doesn't float around in a big, red, hairy cloud; it breaks into s...

Okay, so, I've come to the conclusion that no one cares about this as much as I do; but this still blew my mind and I feel it is my civic duty as a denizen of the internet to tell you about it: So, you know how when you're a little kid and see/hear something and it just stays lodged in some dark corner of your brain  and then years and years later, you see or hear the same thing and you're all like "that was the thing from thing from the time! I finally understand the world!" Well, that happened to me today. I don't know how many of you watch The Borgias (probably not many because it's a massively underrated show), but, anyway, it's a show on HBO about the family of Pope Alexander VI, who presided over a rather dubious papacy during the renaissance (the Borgias have been called the original crime family). Long story short, it makes for good television. Anyway, I've been watching this show for two seasons, which equates to about twenty episod...

So, last night my roommate and I were watching Mulan (finals, cough, cough, finals) and, I don't know if I've been indoctrinated with too much feminist film theory in English 200, but I have some thoughts about it that I never had before. For, example in the song "I'll Make a Man Out of You"; it's pretty ironic that Mulan, who is a women, is in fact the manliest person in the whole army. Which, may or may not be impressive because the other guys in Mulan's army are kind of wimpy (except for Shang who is the most chiseled cartoon character you will even meet), I mean, Chien-Po can't even swim! I would just like to point out that I've been swimming since I was five. But seriously, why is it necessary for Mulan to be so manly? She isn't a man. Why is it so desirable for women to act like men in this movie, I ask you? Like a Man! This is ironic because the whole film is supposedly about the importance of being yourself and, to 'be her...

I don't know if any of you have seen the Disney movie Lady and the Tramp in this century, but as a person who saw it for the first time a few months ago, I have some major issues with this film. It isn't just that pasta is undoubtedly unhealthy for dogs and that mutt gangs roam the streets, no, its the ending that really gets me. For those of you who don't know, during the end sequence of Lady and the Tramp , Lady spots a rat sneaking into the house, presumably to hurt Jim and Darling's baby, but is unable to get inside due to the visiting aunt, the Siamese cats, and their really annoying song which I'm sure we all remember. So, Lady goes to the Tramp for help and they break into the house, the Tramp then proceeds to fight with and kill the rat, although he injures his paw in the process. The aunt then takes the Tramp to the pound, from which Jim and Darling must rescue him when they return home. Now, I'm sure you all see the issue with this turn of events,...