Eyebrows Have No Purpose

So, here's the story. I was looking at myself in the mirror a few minutes ago and I realized that eyebrows look really weird. Try it, look at yourself in the mirror and think about your eyebrows. They bother you now, don't they?

I mean, what is an eyebrow? It's just a random strip of hair across your face. It bothers me because it's such an inconsistency. It's like, skin, skin, eyebrow - there's something off there. I wonder what people would look like without eyebrows, really surprised, probably. I have a friend whose eyebrows are so blonde that she has to dye them to make them visible. To me, that's just strange. I mean, we spend so much time worrying about our eyebrows, plucking and dying, but, let's be real here, eyebrows have no purpose.

I mean, think about it; your life wouldn't be drastically different if you didn't have eyebrows. You wouldn't die or anything, you'd just look like you're in a constant state of shock. Perfect for surprise parties, right? But really, eyebrows are useless. I know that, technically, humans have hair to keep them warm and protect their skin and stuff. That's why we have hair on our heads, because heads are important. But an eyebrow really isn't doing much protecting. So, the way I see it, we should either have hair all over our faces or none at all. I mean, don't you think it's a little silly not to have hairy faces? I mean, monkeys have them and everything seems to going pretty well for the monkeys. Think about it; when was the last time you saw a monkey taking the SATs or paying taxes?

Eyebrows are like pinky toes; people in the future won't have them. Just sayin'.